The different variations of Weed Bro can be found here.Weed Bro (Hindi: Ganja Bhai, गांजा भाई|,) (May 1992 - 11 December 2017), often abbreviated as Bro or the Bro was an indian terrorist who lived in the Cyber. His actual name was actually unknown, but it was assumed to have been Noah Mulugeta. He was most famous for being one of the seven sages of the Church of the Dank as well being one of the deadliest terrorists in S.C.H.O.O.L. (Having killed 138 people) and for being the titular character and main star of The Adventures of Weed Bro and Friends, a decentralized community-produced webcomic to which this wikia is dedicated. He was primarily characterized by an affinity for prohibited psychoactive substances, his revolutionary use of the English language, his unbelievably good sense of his humor, and his regular deadly rampages in india. He was primarily characterized by an affinity for prohibited drugs, his revolutionary use of Troll Science, his unbelievably good sense of his humor, and his regular deadly rampages in India . Additionally, some of Weed Bro's associates, who starred in other similar productions to The Adventures of Weed Bro and Friends, and are also set in on the Cyber, have been known on at least one occasion to compel a teacher to suddenly resign without explanation. This has led to /r/ComedyCemetery, a Weed Bro and anti-S.C.H.O.O.L. hate subreddit on Reddit (it's like 9Gag but without quality memes) to sarcastically use the phrase TEACHER RESIGNED in various circumstances. Occasionally, Weed Bro could be seen wearing a red hat, and sometimes would be seen with have hair. Weed Bro had also been seen to sleep for far above the required amount for a human, natural for a member of The Cyber, on some occasions sleeping for so long that he is confused of the day, month, year, and even century that he is currently in. Weed Bro is known to harbor immense respect for Tim Berners-Lee, due to his role in inventing the internet and Jimmy Wales for his role in creating Wikipedia. Weed Bro did not know the location of Mt. Everest, and was therefore forced to stand on a desk at his school as a child. Weed Bro theorist /u/WTFMyMang used this unusual punishment as supporting evidence of the Weed Bro being of Indian nationality theory, which has become widely accepted among scholars.
Due to his immense popularity, Weed Bro had been the subject of several documentaries, including Weed Bro: Before the Blunt, a ten-part film series exploring Weed Bro's life before he gained world fame through his most popular webseries, The Adventures of Weed Bro and Friends. Despite what the name might suggest, Weed Bro was already an avid marijuana user prior to debuting in his trademark production.
Weed Bro had a soft side that he rarely showed in his attempt to appear as the cool guy. He was once so moved after hearing a touching story that he began to cry, something he usually causes others to do. This can help you, reader, remember that even your heroes are just people, even if they can talk with God or murder a lion. However, he does not appear to have cared much for the well-being of his friends.
Weed Bro had very little, if any, respect for the Constitution's protections against cruel and unusual punishment, as shown in his support of scientific and medical experimentation on criminals in place of animals.
Additionally, he appeared to practice Zoroastrianism, as indicated by the fact that he has dated his own sister, Tina. Weed Bro also appears to be of Azerbaijani-Finnish ancestry since he can fluently speak Finnish and he and his father both speak Azeri Turkish implying that Weed Bro could a second generation Azerbaijani-Finnish man who immigrated to Cybernetic India, although this hypothesis remains controversial.
He was right-handed, and he could change the size of his arm on command. This allowed him to masturbate 20% faster than a horse can.
It is believed by some scholars that Weed Bro may have survived his death and immigrated to Cybernetic America. According to this hypothesis, after seeing /r/ComedyCemetery and the way he was regarded, he became enraged, vowing to destroy this internet that hated him so much. He proceeded to shave his beard, and exchanged his valuable gold chains and used his skills to become a lawyer. He then rose through the ranks of public policy, and is known today as Ajit Pai, the Destroyer of Cyber.
Early Life Edit
As is the case with most Meme Masters, little is known of Weed Bro's early days, however it has been revealed that during the fertilization that led to Weed Bro's conception he, as a sperm, managed to trick all of his unborn siblings into running away from the egg cells through a carefully-crafted lie that Weed Bro's father was actually having Weed Bro's mother perform fellatio on him during the sexual intercourse.
This, as would soon become clear, was just an early display of the profound trolling ability of the Weed Bro.
During Weed Bro's childhood, he had claimed to have participated in a variety of mundane activities which he took pride in, such as pretending that his ruler was a sword, hiding in cupboards, and so on.
Weed Bro was apparently abused and viciously punished by his father for not completing his homework. This early and presumably current abuse, as well as multiple shoe-throwings by his mother, have caused Weed Bro to suffer from mild PTSD, avoiding shoes and belts, especially ones of leather variety.
He also sufferers regular sleeping problems.
Throughout school, Weed Bro, like his brother Sarcastic Bro, frequently caused the resignation of countless teachers due to his trolling "like boss", which, as noted above, has led to the phrase "TEACHER RESIGNED" being used by various Weed Bro HATE subreddits such as /r/ComedyCemetery in an attempt to tarnish his reputation.
Weed Bro has recently been revealed to be a person who is easily driven to suicide, as seen in one comic where he puts an M1911 pistol to each temple because his ex-girlfriend made a baffling and rather confusing comment. This opens up discussion as to whether Weed Bro is suicidal, or if he suffers from a mental disability such as depression or schizophrenia. New information is currently being researched and evaluated by meme scholars and historians.
Weed Bro learned English through watching Cartoon Network and HBO.
See also: Weed Bro family tree
Not much is known about Weed Bro's family. His father appears occasionally, such as the time when allowing Bro's marriage to go ahead, or the time when he was viciously beaten by his wife for having had an romantic relationships prior to having met her. He is also allegedly a member of S.C.H.O.O.L., a terrorist organization active in Cybernetic India.
Weed Bro's mother, on the other hand, has appeared somewhat more often, although she is still very rarely seen. She is known to be extremely emotionally and physically abusive to both Weed Bro and his father; in the former's case, she once threw a shoe at Weed Bro for having asked if he could date someone he liked, although he was able to escape through his ability to run up to 120km per hour, and in the latter's case, she once beat Weed Bro's father for having acknowledged having had sexual relationships prior to having met her. It is made clear that Weed Bro's Mother does not find her son to be at all attractive and resents being called "Mom" by him.
Weed Bro's Grandfather has also made an appearance, although it isn't known whether it's on his mother's or father's side. In fact almost nothing is known about him.
Relationship with Tina Edit
Weed Bro had an on-and-off relationship with a woman named Tina, who appeared to share Weed Bro's love of marijuana given that her eyes were always red, just like Weed Bro's.
It seems that Weed Bro was blackmailing Tina into staying with him, as he threatened to reveal to her family that she had a boyfriend if she broke up with him. To add injury to insult, Weed Bro seems to think quite negatively of Tina, given that he constantly trolled her. Additionally, their relationship was only formed when Weed Bro tricked Tina into breaking up with her boyfriend by claiming he had 5 million dollars. It was later clarified that this was GTA money, much to Tina's dismay, who declared that Weed Bro had "screwed my life".
On May 23, 2017, Tina decided to break up with Weed Bro, as she revealed that she was cheating on him with a 'better man' (possibly his brother, Sarcastic Bro.) However, when she asked for any pictures of her to be returned to her possession, Weed Bro revealed that he was also cheating on Tina, as he mailed her roughly 25 to 30 images of different girls, stating that he forgot which pictures were of her. Also, Weed Bro is not a fan of her cooking.
His sexual relationship with her was quite open, as he felt comfortable enough to crossdress as a nurse. Also, Tina seemed to enjoy roleplay. She once asked him his fantasy, soon after which they met in her bedroom. They both dressed as a sexualized nurse, with seemingly no reaction from Tina.
Prior to their relationship, she had another boyfriend. It seems Weed Bro and Tina had sexual relationships even before they began to date. Tina seemed to cheat on all of her boyfriends, and Weed Bro doesn't seem to mind.
Weed Bro also openly lusts after other women, such as Emma Watson, and an unnamed Russian policewoman. Tina's opinion of Weed Bro's crushes is unknown.
On 21 June 2017, Weed Bro broke up with Tina after playing a ruse on her, to test her loyalty. Bro posed as a friend of his online and made advances on Tina:
"That was not my friend. i was checking your loyality making a fake id of my friend Get the hell out of my life!"
– Weed Bro, sic erat scriptumIn an alternate universe, Weed Bro and Tina are Jedi. This Weed Bro once announced that he loves her, while in the midst of a lightsaber battle, but Tina responded by stating that she views him as a non-romantic friend. Weed Bro responded by pushing her into the path of wild beast. Weed Bro's relationship with Tina came to an almost complete stop after he attempted to murder Tina with his motorcycle.
Post-Tina Romantic Life Edit
Considering Tina appeared to have been one of the very few to find Weed Bro tolerable, it has been hard for Weed Bro to find a new partner, and he has spiraled into a pathetic life of loneliness. However, he doesn't let his single status impede him from any further teacher resignations or epic trolls.
Personal Views Edit
Weed Bro holds many controversial views on society and drugs, and, aside from being an avid user of marijuana, is a declared supporter of experimentation on criminals.
Weed Bro has a strong dislike of math teachers, as he expressed anger about only getting half credit for not using the correct method of an equation despite getting the answer right, failing his exam and possibly his class, likely preventing him from getting a high paying job. This may have led to depression, which may in turn have led to his marijuana addiction. However, this didn't prevent him from becoming CEO of World Bank, but as Reddit Weed Bro theorist /u/Smoppet has noted, it would likely have made his job far more strenuous.
It is also known that Weed Bro is a fan of Clash of Clans, which is quite popular in India. Despite generally being opposed to animal abuse, he has lost a dog purposely on at least one occasion to make a brilliant joke.
Weed Bro famously became the CEO of World Bank while he was engaged to Bill Gates' daughter (it is unclear which of Gates' daughters was his fiancée, or whether this came before, after, or during his relationship with Tina), in a savvy business move that satisfied Weed Bro's Father, Bill Gates, and the President of World Bank. As Weed Bro himself described the endeavor, "THIS IS BUSINESS !!"
Currently, Weed Bro is employed as a police officer and inspector for an unknown city located somewhere in Cybernetic India. Even in the line of duty, Weed Bro's ruses know no bounds, and Weed Bro has continued SAVAGELY trolling while on the job, staying true to his status as a sage of the Church of the Dank, and even, on occasion, trolling the police.
It is known that Weed Bro is in contact with dangerous snipers, and is the son of an anger-prone ex-teacher and an international terrorist. Due to his upbringing, it is probable he became addicted to weed and joined the Underworld.
It is noted that it is it amazing that despite his schooling years and childhood being a complete disaster, Weed Bro has had such an impressive resume.
Weed Bro's Feats Edit
Weed Bro temporarily owned the World Bank. Alongside this, he is good friends with Roger the Sniper, for unknown reasons. He also has caused countless resignations of teachers. He is so clever, in fact, that he is able to completely reverse an attempted mugging. Also, due to the fact that he is still alive, Weed Bro has probably killed a lion. Weed Bro has assaulted a child with a coconut.
In one comic, it is implied that Weed Bro's kisses have some sort of healing power, as he manages to heal Tina's injured hand. Also, Weed Bro has survived a lion attack.
Attempted Suicide Edit
After discovering that Tina considered her Facebook picture to be too old despite having been taken a mere three hours ago, Weed Bro was overcome by the utter futility of life. Humanity had become nothing more than consumerist cockroaches, gluttonous creatures that ate and consumed and wasted in the perpetual and futile task of distracting themselves from the all-consuming maw of death. Weed Bro proceeded to use two Desert Eagle fifty calibre pistols on himself; however, it appears that Weed Bro eventually decided against killing himself. He then proceeded to engage in a hedonistic crime spree, culminating in the mugging of U.S. President Donald J. Trump.
Weed Bro's Downfall and Arrest Edit
In his later life, Weed Bro's life took a turn for the worse - he has suffered numerous alcohol induced mental break downs, committed unspeakable acts of violence in S.C.H.O.O.L. (Including donating 5 litres of petroleum to burning a school and Robbing a bank) He has had multiple break-ups with Tina, witnessed the death of An Ambulance, and has had a lackluster sex life - and finally gave in to his insanity. Long struggles went on for days, until one fateful night, Weed Bro decided he had had enough of this madness. He decided must confess for his sins and receive proper judgment. Finally, after months of hiding from police, he walked into the station of the Russian police force himself, and turned himself in.
He was arrested for a second time in June 2017 after reporting that some people had died. Unfortunately for him, he was actually in a graveyard and was imprisoned for wasting police time.
Fortunately for Weed Bro, he was able to use the Not Guilty legal loophole to escape any judicial punishment.
Attempting to Murder Tina Edit
Having been freed from prison, Weed Bro proceeded to attempt murdering Tina by attacking her with a motorcycle. However, he was not prosecuted as he was able to convince the judge that it had merely been an accident (he would've still been able to use the Not Guilty loophole had he been indicted). Interestingly, he would later tell Armless Bro that he had actually killed Tina by stabbing her with a wooden stake, although it has been proposed that this claim may have just been the setup for another one of Weed Bro's epic trolls, as it immediately followed Weed Bro saying that he believed Tina may have been a vampire. After this incident Tina, he declared SINGLE stood for Stress Is Now Gone, Life Is Easier, although this would actually spell out SINGLIE.
Unbeknownst to Weed Bro, however, Tina remained alive in a coma for five months after this incident, until she miraculously recovered.
Clashes with the Indian Armed Forces Edit
After learning that Weed Bro had been let free for a third time, the Cybernetic Indian Parliament was outraged and placed a bounty of 6.5 million Indian rupees (100k U.S. dollars) on Weed Bro.
Following this, Weed Bro went into hiding for a few weeks but was unable to flee Cybernetic India due to Foreign Dictator Bro having just been installed as the dictator of Cybernetic Pakistan, and so hid in Jaithari, India instead, where he remained until September 10th, 2017, when he was discovered by an Indian soldier. The soldier opened fire, but in a masterful act of Trolling, all bullets were diverted to his specially-designed magnet helmet (despite bullets being made out of lead).
India was utterly humiliated. Weed Bro escaped for a fourth time.
Owning a Zoo Edit
After having escaped execution at the hands of the Indian Armed Forces, Weed Bro decided to go incognito and take on the life as a zoo manager. Initially, he put the price at 10k Indian rupees (the equivalent of about 150 U.S. dollars). Following financial difficulties due to the fact that few potential customers were willing to pay the high price, he lowered it to ₹5000 or $76. Then he lowered it to ₹1000 or $15.
When he realized that still no one was willing to pay these prices, he conceived a brilliant plan: He would make the zoo free to enter, but then after the visitors would come he would release lions and make the exit fee ₹20000 or $305.
This plan worked perfectly. In this incident, he made ₹760000 from 38 survivors who could pay up. He also killed 183 people who couldn't pay up, while wounding 20 who illegally escaped without paying. This is considered S.C.H.O.O.L.'s deadliest terrorist attack so far.
Sociopathic Behavior Edit
In the weeks following the zoo attacks, Weed Bro committed no major action against Indian civilians. However, among the terrorist attacks he did perform were the killing of an unarmed couple near Jobang, India and the assault of a child with a coconut.
Murder of Armless Bro Edit
After laying low for awhile as a wanted criminal, Weed Bro started getting paranoid. When he had to do an assignment for S.C.H.O.O.L, he consulted his brother/D.N.A clone, Armless Bro. When he presumably failed, he asked him how he did, revealing Armless Bro got an 80%. Getting intimidated and afraid of his clone outdoing him with sudden mutations, Weed Bro murdered him in cold blood. This proved to be a safe bet, as Armless Bro sprouted arms in his final moment. He then sent a message to all of The Cyber, to tag their friends, warning them of the oncoming onslaught.
Deteriorating Health Edit
After murdering Armless Bro, Weed Bro planned to murder more civilians in Odisha Province. However, Before he could do this, He fell into a lake and caught a fever. It appears to be a simple cold currently, But most scholars believe it could turn into Influenza if untreated. In his desperation to stay alive, the offered the number of his beloved Tina to anyone who could cure his illness.
Encountering the Recovered Tina EditFive months about the motorcycle incident and 15 days after becoming ill, Weed Bro met up with Tina once more, who had promptly visited Weed Bro's house after her miraculous recovery, which Weed Bro was not aware of. However, because he was dazed from a combination of his illness and sleep deprivation, Weed Bro failed tor realize the significance of encountering Tina after her supposed death, and proceeded to have a normal conversation with her. Weed Bro asked if she wanted to go out for a drink, to which Tina responded that she didn't drink. He then asked her if she wanted to eat something, to which she responded that she was on a diet. He finally asked Tina if she wanted to go out for some fresh air, to which she responded that she did not breath.
Despite being in such a a dazed state, these answers nonetheless struck Weed Bro as being quite peculiar, as he failed to realize that the reason she didn't drink or breathe was because her water and oxygen were still being supplied via feeding tubes at the hospital. Upon further reflection he suddenly realized that it was very strange that Tina had even been alive, given that he believed he had killed her a few months earlier. As he prepared to ask how she was alive, however, Tina disappeared without a trace.
Weed Bro wondered if he had dreamed or hallucinated the entire conversation. He searched his house, but found no sign of Tina anywhere.
Forever alone, he lamented. He realized he would be a lone guerrilla for the remainder of 2018. He cried a little, before resuming his normal activities.
Following this, Weed Bro, being a strict adherent of scientism, began questioning his own sanity as he could find no other explanation for either Tina's appearance or for why she didn't drink or breathe other than being a visitor from beyond the grave. In order to calm himself down, Weed Bro convinced himself that his encounter with Tina had really just been a strange dream. Of course, unbeknownst to Weed Bro, it really *was* Tina, as she had survived.
Learning of Tina's Survival Edit
Shortly after his encounter with Tina's "ghost", Weed Bro was texted by Tina from the hospital to inform him that she had survived.
Ever since the incident in Odisha province, Weed bro's health had been deteriorating further and further. He had even made posts on Facebook, whatsapp, twitter and his blog about his sickness. Ironically, His attention to his social media had made him neglect actually going to the doctor, And on 11th of December, 2017 weed bro passed away due to Influenza.
Artist Rendition Of Weedbro EditIf Weed Bro were more realistic, he could look like this. ----->
- ↑ https://www.reddit.com/r/ComedyCemetery/comments/68rbgj/weed_bro_being_a_savage/
- ↑ https://www.reddit.com/r/translator/comments/7j3jrf/english_hindi_could_someone_translate_weed/dr3cjdi/
- ↑ https://www.reddit.com/r/ComedyCemetery/comments/7iao0l/bros_dad_doesnt_believe_him_even_though_he_was/
- ↑ https://www.reddit.com/r/ComedyCemetery/comments/6zlmbr/weed_bro_informs_us_on_his_sleeping_patterns/
- ↑ https://www.reddit.com/r/ComedyCemetery/comments/5lehq3/its_as_profitable_as_it_gets/
- ↑ https://www.reddit.com/r/ComedyCemetery/comments/7h12r3/weedbro_confesses_the_murder_of_tina_to_armlessbro/
- ↑ https://www.reddit.com/r/ComedyCemetery/comments/6uoccp/yeah_im_s_i_n_g_l_i_e/
- ↑ https://www.reddit.com/r/ComedyCemetery/comments/6zaf5g/bulletproof/dmu2i5h/
- ↑ https://www.reddit.com/r/ComedyCemetery/comments/72shsz/bro_has_zoothe_conspiracy_thiccens/dnl280d/
- ↑ https://www.reddit.com/r/ComedyCemetery/comments/7e1uq7/weed_bro_expresses_his_regret_over_murdering_tina/
- ↑ https://www.reddit.com/r/ComedyCemetery/comments/7j198l/xd_weed_bro_dies/
- Weed Bro was once the CEO of World Bank.
- Weed Bro's preferred internet browser is Google Chrome
- Weed Bro may or may not become blind after a picture on the internet surfaced of him with his eyes closed.
- Weed Bro can run up to 120 kilometers per hour when threatened
- Weed Bro has a strong dislike of the letter K.
- Weed Bro is half owl and can rotate his neck 180 degrees.
- Weed Bro is a crafty ruse man as displayed in his elaborate practical joke on Tina when he said he loved YouTube, but he delayed enunciating the final four letters of the word so as to troll her into laboring under the misapprehension that he was confession his infatuation with her.
- After his (maybe half-) brother Sarcastic Bro admits his real name (Abdul Khan Mohammad) it's likely that Weed Bro's surname is also Mohammad.
- Weed Bro possesses extensive knowledge on Einstein's theories, even to the point where he knows about the "No study = Fail" theorem that Einstein never published.
- Weed Bro has saved the world as a jpg
- Weed Bro can't swim.
- Weed Bro is able to fluently speak Finnish.
- He and his dad can also fluently speak Azeri Turkish.
- Weed Bro has the alter ego of Noah Mulugeta.
- He also has the alias of High Dude.
- His real name may be Noah Mulugeta.
|Weed Bro Canon Characters|
|Weed Bro • Tina • Sarcastic Bro • Weed Bro's Father • Weed Bro's Mother • Sarcastic Auntie • Weed Dude • The High Bros • Teacher|
|Armless Bro • Rockin' Hair Bro • Sarcastic Chandler • Genius Bro • Tommy Max • Correct Bro • Appy Fish • Cybernetic God • Weed Dude's mother • Weed Dude's girlfriend • Weed Dude's father • Jamema bin Laden • The Police • The High Sisters • The High Sisters|
|Roger • Munna • Old Bro • Sarcastic Grandma • Cool Bro • Psycho The Rapist • Jigsaw • Fetal Alcohol Syndrome Bro • An Ambulance • Scarlet Macaw • Bronald Trump • Isaac Newton • Sarcastic Auntie's Son • Jeff|